haiku by brigitte troestl
 
  Kellergassentüren 
  jeder Fremde darf herein 
  Schweigen brechen, Wein 
 
  commentary by the teachers
 
Sabine feels that the first line is too
heavy... "ein deutsches Wortmonstrum"...
for such a short poem. The second line is
too direct...."erzählerisch", and the third
line is then completely lyrical. Three
different styles in one poem take away
from the harmony of the poem. Perhaps a
new try?